The 2005 Dyckman Awards
-after Tony Medina

Best Vanilla Dutch blunt-roller
Best jaraqui-kaki seller
Best stash spot of all staircases
Best underage club-promoter
Best I’m not a stripper, I’m a Go-go dancer. Come work for me.
Best after-hour Cubanos, with ketchup on the side, mucho ajo please
Best street to spark up without being caught
Best the block is hot caller
Best lobby-camera blindspot
Best rooftop to philosophize over Hard Mike’s Lemonade
Best don’t tell mami morning-sickness & abortion combo
Best stoop-seat to keep up with all the building gossip
Best let me guard this parking spot for you side-hustle
Best community dick, but he keep it clean
Best smoke-shop to sell alcohol, no ID
Best bottle-opening teeth technique
Best I never cop, but I always got that bit
Best coro to break nights with
Best your moms is looking for you messenger
Best down-the-window key-thrower
Best side of the building escape alley
Best young and in love, toxic couple
Best keys-between-the-knuckles maneuver
Best tremenda muela, but you fall for it anyway
Best capicú ever
Best santera to read your tarot
Best milf with the natural bubble
Best french-kisser, but she don’t really go that way
Best coinstar machine
Best pawnshop policy
Best didn’t know how good it was ’til it was gone
Best vigil. Best sidewalk Eulogy.
Best summer block soundtrack.
Best I gotta get out the hood comeback. Best block.